I saw Jen Lancaster on Friday night!!! Yes! THE Jen Lancaster!

You know the scenes where he goes to Pamela Anderson’s book signing? I figured I’d just throw Jen Lancaster in the wedding sack and be on my way.

By the time we left it was after 9:30. I was famished. HH decided to completely make my evening and took me out for a quick date at a local wine bar.
A few blocks from the beach, lovely lighting and decor, amazing food (braised short rib sliders with caramelized onions and Gruyere cheese, served with Truffle Oil and Parmesan homemade chips? Hellloooo!) and a nice Chalk Hill Chardonnay by the glass. Perfect.
HH and I are about to settle in for our little impromptu date, when my phone rings. I can see from my caller ID that “Home” is calling. That is never good.
I answer. It’s Conner. He is practically in tears.
C: “Mom? I think there’s something lodged in my throat.”
Me: “Well, Conner, the fact that you can breathe and talk means you are not choking.”
C: “But I think maybe it’s pizza and it’s lodged in there.”
Me: “Just relax. You’re OK, you’re not choking. You can breathe.”
C: “Should I try to hit myself on the back or something?”
Me: “Do NOT try to do that. You’re fine, just relax…”
At this point, HH can figure out what’s up by my end of the conversation and we are both cracking up. I am trying to soothe my frightened child while I am laughing at him. (Mother of the Year, I know…)
You see, every single night at dinner, for the past 10 years or so, Conner hears us tell him “Hey! That is waaaay too big of a bite!” or “Slow down!” or “Chew your food!” Watching this kid eat is sort of like watching a snake try to swallow a goat. You’d think he had a long and traumatic history with having his food yanked away from him before he got to eat any. We don’t understand why he does this, but each member of our family really should be trained for the Heimlich Manuever.
We got him calmed down. We enjoyed our late night snack and drink. We talked about our evening, our kids, the funny things that happen. While it would have been fun to have a drink with Jen Lancaster, I am confident that I will always be surrounded by plenty of funny.
I absolutely cherish these kinds of reads where your belly aches from laughter because the writer is just that funny. Thanks for reminding me of this great author !
cool. I’ve never heard of her but she sounds great. LOVE her outfit!
I truly enjoyed reading this post. Aside from the fact that I’d probably stretch your shoes out, I can so see me doing the same exact thing. I don’t know, it even creates the desire in me to go out and write some fantastical witty novel. Seriously!
Your excitement was palpable. I felt as if I were there. And if you are talking about the southern bay area i could’ve been.
And you said nothing about the plaid pants? That surprises me for some reason.
One more random thought…if I looked like you I would post pictures of me with every post possible. ๐
I was surprised about no comment on the plaid pants too! But, you said it WAS 80’s theme, so we’ll let it go. : ) Next time, I’ll go with you! Yes, I’ll drive 1,000 miles to stand in a line FOREVER to see an author. I love writers, they’re like rockstars in my book! Sounds like you had great fun, I’m jealous. This author is at the very tippy top of my list to read after seeing your props to her in other posts!
She should pay you for advertising…
Macey
First of all…Thank you so much for having that book signed for me! You Rock! You are now a part of me stalking Jen by association. My sister had her sign a copy of Bitter the week before in Dallas. LOL!
I love that your hubby went with you and that you got a little date night in. That slider sounds awesome! Why can’t I get food like that in Utah?
If I could have been there…we could have gotten her in the Wedding Sack!
I’m glad you got to meet her, even if it wasn’t exactly how you imagined!
And taking Connie’s book…you’re such a good friend!!
I’ve never read anything of hers, but I trust you and Connie, so, I probably should check her out!
I imagine that the way these books read is similar to the wit and LOL-humor I find in your posts. Am I right?? I will have to check her out and let you know. In fact, I am going to hop on over to Amazon right now to order- which one do you suggest I get first???
~Becca
*squeal! I love meeting authors. ONce I blogged about an author and she commented and then sent me an advanced SIGNED copy of her new book. Then I blogged about it again, about 6 years later and she commented AGAIN and did a Friday Freebie for me. How cool is THAT?
Anyway – SO funny that you mention Jen Lancaster because I *Just* picked up my first of her books and it’s sitting on my shelf to read. It looks Hilarious and I can’t wait to get to it!
And it sounds like you had a good evening. ๐
How fun! I haven’t read her most recent book, but the others were hilarious.