These are two back to back posts, originally published on July 10, 2008…. within about 1 hour of each other.
So this bee walks into a bar and orders a baking soda bath, with a chaser of baking soda paste…
You’re out playing in the yard (pretending to be a dog, of course) and a bee lands near you. Should you:
a) attempt to engage him in conversation, a la Bee Movie, and hope he sounds just like Jerry Seinfeld and that you will become best friends and launch a small business together?
b) sit down with him and have a heart to heart about why he is no longer putting little plastic toys in your box of Honey-Nut Cheerios?
c) try and catch him with your bare hands?
The answer is not c.
So this bee and this dog form a support group…
You have just recently stopped crying after having been stung by a bee.
You have had a baking soda bath and sat in the tub with a baking soda paste smeared onto the sting.
Your mom has soothed you and explained to you why you should leave bees alone.
You are once again dressed and ready for action.
Now should you:
a) join your brothers for the Wii tournament currently underway?
b) have some lunch like mom suggests?
c) read your books, watch a movie or play nicely with your toys?
d) go back outside, crawl into the doghouse (that you’re not allowed to go into) and disturb an old, cranky, arthritic, sleeping Dalmatian… and then come bawling to mom because nature has once again turned on you, after literally not letting a sleeping dog lie?
The answer that will send mommy scrambling for her Xanax prescription?
That answer would be “d”.