My wonderful husband surprised me with a birthday dinner at one of my favorite restaurants last night. Our friends Ernie & Raquel and Brett & Laurie were waiting for us when we came in. It was such a nice surprise, especially since things have been really hectic and stressful.
Rich is very fortunate that “hectic and stressful” worked to his advantage to get me to the dinner. Earlier in the day I asked him are you sure you want to go out? I was fine with staying home. Yep! We’re going out on a date! We took our boys to Ernie & Raquel’s because they were going to hang out there while Rich and I went out.
My mind has been so on overload, that I missed it when Devin said “hey aren’t the WoJos going out with you?” I also missed it when Conner apparently made even more of a scene trying to shush him and remind him that it was a secret. It didn’t make sense that Raquel’s hair looked really cute, even though I knew she’d been at the beach all day! I missed it when their Conner shouted “I thought you guys were going with them?!” as we went out their front door.
I also missed all of the stalling techniques that were employed.
Instead of heading off for our “date” at Taco Surf (super low-key!) Rich says he’d like to make a stop on Memory Lane and get an ice cream sundae from McDonald’s drive-thru… just like we did in high school. Before dinner?! Um. OK. Nope, I don’t want my own… I’ll just share some of yours. Even when stressed and crazy, I would never be one to stop my husband if he got on a sentimental tangent. I love those!
However, I do not love it when he takes the longest, most indirect route to get places. I usually like to get from point A to point B. Period. I don’t like spontaneous visits at points C through Z. (Note: this perspective applies only to travel. It does not apply to conversation or writing. Obviously.)
I’ve seen Long Beach… I know the routes to Taco Surf. PCH…? Great. Thanks for taking one that is longer AND more congested. Fine. I’m going to be calm and, as Rich requested, let him pilot the car and the evening. Breathe in, breathe out – smile. I am making a concerted effort to remind myself that I’m hanging out with my husband. Alone. How often does that happen!? Enjoy just being with him. (So what that there are no chips and salsa, and that I’m not holding a beer. So what that my Baja fish tacos are not getting any closer.)
“Hey! That’s the Best Buy where I bought the boys’ Wii! Wanna stop in and look around?” Um. Sure? (I’m thinking about how Taco Surf is going to have a line out the door by the time we get there, but yeah, we do have that stupid hands-free cell phone law now, maybe a Bluetooth would be good….) We shop. We choose. We pay. Yaay! Taco Surf? Ugh. Not if he turns the wrong way in the parking lot.
“Hey, how about Tantalum? I mean, we’re right here.” I kind of had my mouth all set for fish tacos… What about the Acapulco right next door? No?… Because there are probably… noisy kids in there? OK. Under less foggy circumstances, I would have argued ’til the cows came home (and trashed our date!)
- I’m not dressed for Tantalum.
- Tantalum is a Pomegranate Martini night, not a beer night and Martini nights always ending up costing much more than beer nights.
- No chips & salsa refills. (No chips & salsa at all!)
- We’ve taken up an hour of our date time already with ice cream and electronics. And exploration. How long can we expect the WoJos to keep the boys?
- Since when do noisy kids alter our plans?
However, I didn’t have the energy or wits to be anything other than docile. In we go. I wondered why Rich was discussing specific times with the hostess when this was a spur of the moment decision. I was still wondering that when led to the table where our friends were waiting. Slow brain speed = good for surprises.
Great dinner, great company, great night.
Maybe the lesson for me is that I shouldn’t try to control every little thing. Maybe my way isn’t always the best way. Maybe I shouldn’t get an attitude before I have all of the information.
But probably not.